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Fri | October 14, 2005
wish come true
"Lil-y" he said somewhat lamely. Just slightly.
He never says my name. He never has to get my attention, as he did last night when he came out of his room and talked to me from the hall. My door happened to be ajar.
He found a convention for us to go to, by Digital Life. It’s tomorrow.
Hey wow— ask and you shall receive. Recently I’ve been saying, "where are we going to go on vacation?" because I think we both need a change of scene.
"Lil-y," he said, "I found someplace for vacation."
I am not so interested in the convention, actually. Anything that involves going to the Javits center and wandering among makeshift cubicles of junk (even if it is shiny cool electronic junk) will probably drain me and fill me with despair. It's like being at Costco.
However I am interested in getting my brother out of the house. Henry wants to check out Phantasy Star Universe. And I am also interested in being his sidekick, which I have always been in the best of times. When I haven't had the energy or confidence to be his supporter, things have gone wrong for both of us. It's a sign of a lack of faith in myself, in my ability to handle it all, to take care of him as well as myself. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. And the faltering seems to trickle down to him somehow. Or maybe I feel too responsible for things.
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